Friday, April 9, 2010

Siblings of an Aspie kid.

First off, I AM NOT SPEAKING FROM EXPERIENCE, nor am I pregnant or planning on becoming so. This is purely by observation, thought, and things my husband and I have noticed over the years.

Aspie parents talk. A lot, to each other about our kids. Their pluses, their minuses, their failures, and their awards. We generally seem to talk about Aspie issues, which is good because that is how we learn about new techniques, therapies, and if we are gonna stay where we are or move onto something new, or not try anything else at all.

Since we only have the one boy, and 3 kitty cat brothers, I often wonder what it is like to be the human sibling of an Asperger's child. Do they, the siblings, need more attention? I know my son's friends have siblings and he is totally fascinated by them. I like these kids because they have a real unique perspective, and frankly are a hoot.

Our lives get so insulated, or at least ours does, with our son's issues that other things get laid aside, or forgotten in the long term. We are so wrapped up in the therapy, the lists, and the OMG what happened a minute ago...our kid did WHAT? What is it like for the siblings? Do they have to work harder, or behave better or be better students to prove what? I know this is a venue where we are sadly lacking in perspective. I, for one, had siblings, much older than myself. Although I am happy my son goes to the school we went to I can say with MUCH relief that I am happy that most of the teachers that were there when I was there are retired. I often heard, "Are you going to be like your sister?" from many teachers remember when one of my sisters was at the school. She didn't do anything wrong, as a family we considered most of it was considered pretty funny stuff. But as the insecure, shy high school student that I was that statement mortified me beyond belief. I attempted to go out of my way in the other direction....whatever that was, and looked like a big goof.

Anyway, my point is, we need to keep the kids, and siblings in mind. All kids are all different, just like our Aspie's and because of that I admire parents with mulitple kids, I can barely keep my human boy and the kitty brothers straight...how in the world do they manage?

OH and totally unrelated, I hope you are all watching Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution. It is produced by Ryan Seacrest and if you get a chance go on Twitter and tell Ryan how much you LOVE the show. It is amazing and if we can improve the diets of our kids the way of health will be clear.