Sunday, March 16, 2014

Get off my hallway floor!

We were busy yesterday.

The boy had an appointment in the AM. Usually we are the 7 AM appointment with this doctor. Normally I make these appointments for some emergency reason or the fact that we are scheduled to the hilt and don't have much time during the regular week.

The cuter half made an observation (it is coming later in the story- wait for it)- we were in the office with the boy discussing his medications. Usually I have to answer the questions but this time the doc asked the boy. "What are you taking? What vitamins? Why? What do you think about this? How do you feel?
The boy had to answer. Some questions he didn't know the answer to...he just couldn't think that quickly.

Then it came out.

The doc told the boy, "Well, you HAVE TO CONFORM OR YOU WILL BE IN A GROUP HOME. End of Story. Stop blaming your parents for making you do your homework Quit whining and get it done."

As Emiril would say, "BAM!"

Then while we were talking to her she told us about a patient who was laying in her hallway. The hallway isn't dirty but it certainly isn't clean and why the hell would some kid lay in a doc office hallway? What are the parents thinking? Yeah, it is easier to let the kid do what they want (spin, wear underwear on their heads) but the real parenting comes in where you tell them, "Get up. Get off the floor. Sit down read a magazine and do not move until we are called."

Kind of like the movie theater thing- get a movie theatre and then keep the lights on and let the kids wander around the place and do whatever. How are they going to learn to sit on their butts and watch a movie? Too loud? USE earplugs. I used to carry the little yellow ones in my purse to put in the boy's ears during a movie. How are the kids to learn HOW to sit at a doc office if allowed to lay in the hallway? It is all the same thing.

As I would delicately say, "Holy Shit Batman."

After the boy left the room (and I stopped laughing - it took me a minute or two) She have me some tips on what to do do allieviate some potential issues...the preseverating, the obessive compulsive the arguing the constant mouthing off.... (I get to become a drama queen....I will keep you posted on how that goes). Then the cuter half muttered, "Finally someone got their big girl pants on and told the boy how it is (he won't listen to us)."

Oddly enough, there were a number of different ways I wanted to write about this stuff. I really had some thoughts going through my head about how to handle it and which way to go.
I mean, really, how often does a doc come in tell your kid to grow up and start acting his age and then tell him to do what he needs to go or he will end up in a group home becuase your parents have had enough of the special ed whining bullshit (my term) and that he needs to get his act going and start doing this stuff and leaving the cuter half and I alone....cause we are very tired of hearing about it.

I am still wrapping my head around it.

It was a glorious thing to hear. So validating for both of us. We are worn down, burned out and extremely tired.

ROCK on Doc - ROCK on.


Monday, March 3, 2014

Dyslexia- who knew?

What is dyslexia?
According to the National Center for Learning Disabilities:
  • Dyslexia is the name for specific learning disabilities in reading.
  • Dyslexia is often characterized by difficulties with accurate word recognition, decoding and spelling.
  • Dyslexia may cause problems with reading comprehension and slow down vocabulary growth.
  • Dyslexia may result in poor reading fluency and reading out loud.
  • Dyslexia is neurological and often genetic.
  • Dyslexia is not the result of poor instruction.
  • With the proper support, almost all people with dyslexia can become good readers and writers.

  • Some times I wonder if we read too much into what is going on with the boy. Last weekend we were struggling to help him with a studying for a test. I swore that he was unable to read. As it turns out he was unable to read my cursive (after continuously typing my handwriting is terrible). But still even words he has seen before, like stimuli, reactiveness, intervention, and pyschiatry. He struggled with pronunciation, definitions and appropriate usage.

    Oddly enough, the grades and secondary are not really willing to test for dyslexia. I am not sure why that is. I had asked for it often enough. I think the one time in the grades I asked and was told, "No you moved him out of special ed english (remember cat, and and tv?) so he doesn't need to be tested for dyslexia. He's fine." This from a special ed teacher who later went after us in a very unprofessional manner. Bitch.

    Anyhow, I have been thinking that we need to look at this as an option. I don't know if it will help the boy with his learning. I have NO clue what to do but there are some thoughts included from this website here:
    It helps to identify dyslexia as early in life as possible. Adults with unidentified dyslexia often work in jobs below their intellectual capacity. But with help from a tutor, teacher, or other trained professional, almost all people with dyslexia can become good readers and writers. Use the following strategies to help to make progress with dyslexia.
    Expose your child to early oral reading, writing, drawing, and practice to encourage development of print knowledge, basic letter formation, recognition skills and linguistic awareness (the relationship between sound and meaning).
    • Have your child practice reading different kinds of texts. This includes books, magazines, ads and comics.
    • Include multi-sensory, structured language instruction. Practice using sight, sound and touch when introducing new ideas.
    • Seek modifications in the classroom. This might include extra time to complete assignments, help with note taking, oral testing and other means of assessment.
    • Use books on tape and assistive technology. Examples are screen readers and voice recognition computer software.
    • Get help with the emotional issues that arise from struggling to overcome academic difficulties.
    Reading and writing are key skills for daily living. However, it is important to also emphasize other aspects of learning and expression. Like all people, those with dyslexia enjoy activities that tap into their strengths and interests. For example, people with dyslexia may be attracted to fields that do not emphasize language skills. Examples are design, art, architecture, engineering and surgery.
    The warning signs:
    Dyslexia: Warning Signs By Age

    Young Children

    Trouble With:
    • Recognizing letters, matching letters to sounds and blending sounds into speech
    • Pronouncing words, for example saying “mawn lower” instead of “lawn mower”
    • Learning and correctly using new vocabulary words
    • Learning the alphabet, numbers, and days of the week or similar common word sequences
    • Rhyming

    School-Age Children

    Trouble With:
    • Mastering the rules of spelling
    • Remembering facts and numbers
    • Handwriting or with gripping a pencil
    • Learning and understanding new skills; instead, relying heavily on memorization
    • Reading and spelling, such as reversing letters (d, b) or moving letters around (left, felt)
    • Following a sequence of directions
    • Trouble with word problems in math

    Teenagers and Adults

    Trouble With:
    • Reading at the expected level
    • Understanding non-literal language, such as idioms, jokes, or proverbs
    • Reading aloud
    • Organizing and managing time
    • Trouble summarizing a story
    • Learning a foreign language
    • Memorizing