You Lost it!
"Where is my homework? You touched my pile of papers that fell out of my binder when you opened it."
The boy "mislaid" his math homework. TO his credit, he has been going to get assistance during the school day. His homework load during the evening is enormous. However, like most Aspies, the organization of such has much to be desired.
Tonight's almost meltdown was over his homework.....or the lack thereof. I had gone into his binder to see what his schedule was for a calendar I was looking at. He proceeded to have a conniption when I asked him where his homework was and why it wasn't in the folder. Instead multiple classes were in the front of his binder and he informed me that, "I don't care if it isn't organized, you lost it, it is all your fault." After THAT tirade I decided that I didn't care what he said I wasn't believing that he did his work and that he had better come up with a better one to tell me.
This doesn't make the Mom of the house want to help much. Kind of like the spoiled kids who sued their Mom for the lack of college care packages and homecoming dress.....give me a break OK. It is not my job to keep track of homework. I will encourage DOING the homework and help if I am asked but it is not my job as a parent to keep track of every stupid piece of paper. I knew where my homework was when I had to do it.....it is now his turn to give it a shot.
After much yelling by the boy about how organization sucks and that his paper was thrown out (???really by whom- I just found a bunch of papers in the binder and dropped them on the table) I left the room. I don't get paid enough to put up with this crap.
About 20 min later he came in and asked me to help with a different class of homework....the lack of apology for being a world class jerk showed and the lack of being allowed to play video games is going to show more when things go "missing" this evening......hmmmm. I am a good Mom BTW - fortunately MY parents didn't put up with junk like this and neither will the cuter one and I.
In an oblique sort of way tonight's message is about being responsible and not blaming others for your faults. Whether they be yours, your parents, siblings, whatever.
For myself, I know when I mess up good...and being the way I am my messes are always much better than most peoples (I can get really creative too, which helps). I make certain I do a thorough and complete job when I screw up. I even accept when I have been wrong and apologize (if ya don't get an apology from me that means it isn't required and won't be forthcoming)....fortunately I have been informed nightly I have been wrong about something; even though I know I am not......Lucky for me I have very reliable sources telling me I am right....rather than listen to someone else I am going with my reliable sources.....they are nice to me.
The boy, on the other hand is "skating on thin ice" as far as this evenings lack of being responsible goes.... his inability to accept what was wrong and the "I was mad" Tough beaners kid. No chick is gonna put up with that junk...I ought to know. HE will learn but it is the learning curve that is the most painful part.
Tomorrow will be a better day but for today the weariness sets in and I am tired. The cuter one is tired too....and yes I did a BIG mess up with him as well although just maybe I did a good thing with the giant frosted sugar cookie. Doubt it though....I am gonna be apologizing and living this one down for at least a year. With good reason too.....how dumb can I be? (Don't answer that..I already know thanks so much.)
Classic example of accepting responsibility and apologizing when wrong...and yes I am still apologizing to the cute one....after all he is really cute.
The boy "mislaid" his math homework. TO his credit, he has been going to get assistance during the school day. His homework load during the evening is enormous. However, like most Aspies, the organization of such has much to be desired.
Tonight's almost meltdown was over his homework.....or the lack thereof. I had gone into his binder to see what his schedule was for a calendar I was looking at. He proceeded to have a conniption when I asked him where his homework was and why it wasn't in the folder. Instead multiple classes were in the front of his binder and he informed me that, "I don't care if it isn't organized, you lost it, it is all your fault." After THAT tirade I decided that I didn't care what he said I wasn't believing that he did his work and that he had better come up with a better one to tell me.
This doesn't make the Mom of the house want to help much. Kind of like the spoiled kids who sued their Mom for the lack of college care packages and homecoming dress.....give me a break OK. It is not my job to keep track of homework. I will encourage DOING the homework and help if I am asked but it is not my job as a parent to keep track of every stupid piece of paper. I knew where my homework was when I had to do it.....it is now his turn to give it a shot.
After much yelling by the boy about how organization sucks and that his paper was thrown out (???really by whom- I just found a bunch of papers in the binder and dropped them on the table) I left the room. I don't get paid enough to put up with this crap.
About 20 min later he came in and asked me to help with a different class of homework....the lack of apology for being a world class jerk showed and the lack of being allowed to play video games is going to show more when things go "missing" this evening......hmmmm. I am a good Mom BTW - fortunately MY parents didn't put up with junk like this and neither will the cuter one and I.
In an oblique sort of way tonight's message is about being responsible and not blaming others for your faults. Whether they be yours, your parents, siblings, whatever.
For myself, I know when I mess up good...and being the way I am my messes are always much better than most peoples (I can get really creative too, which helps). I make certain I do a thorough and complete job when I screw up. I even accept when I have been wrong and apologize (if ya don't get an apology from me that means it isn't required and won't be forthcoming)....fortunately I have been informed nightly I have been wrong about something; even though I know I am not......Lucky for me I have very reliable sources telling me I am right....rather than listen to someone else I am going with my reliable sources.....they are nice to me.
The boy, on the other hand is "skating on thin ice" as far as this evenings lack of being responsible goes.... his inability to accept what was wrong and the "I was mad" Tough beaners kid. No chick is gonna put up with that junk...I ought to know. HE will learn but it is the learning curve that is the most painful part.
Tomorrow will be a better day but for today the weariness sets in and I am tired. The cuter one is tired too....and yes I did a BIG mess up with him as well although just maybe I did a good thing with the giant frosted sugar cookie. Doubt it though....I am gonna be apologizing and living this one down for at least a year. With good reason too.....how dumb can I be? (Don't answer that..I already know thanks so much.)
Classic example of accepting responsibility and apologizing when wrong...and yes I am still apologizing to the cute one....after all he is really cute.
