Friday, April 15, 2011

Pomogrante wine and other details

There really is nothing about wine in this post.
I just liked the title.
we had some pomogrante wine with dinner...it was nothing great. I think my cuz's place could do much better than this stuff.
I learned something this week. A friend of the boy did an experiment. I think it is cool. She was participating in a psych fair and the boy came to help with her project.
This is neat.
Did you know that people with Aspergers don't yawn when other people do. They don't. The group did this with the boy a bout 3 or more times and he didn't yawn once. The theory is that many people on the spectrum don't have the concept of the sympathy yawn or something like that.
Our next thought was, "Well, that is really interesting. So if we were dead and lying on the side of the road would the boy go, "Oh thank goodness, now I can go play video games?" I know that is dreadful but there are times as a parent when you begin to wonder...
Seriously though, try the yawn thing; I know it sounds nuts but check it out and see if your peep's yawn when you do.....and if they don't....well then that is one way you know for certain the diagnosis is probably on target.
The boy is consistent. He doesn't yawn when we do. Since she mentioned that to me I have been watching and it is really on target.....the things you learn over flatbread pizza in your family room. Amazing.

Another thing: teaching sublty is hard work. Especialy when I am about as subtle as a 2 sided sledge hammer with a corded belt. We are working on it with the boy, and the results are unusual. We have a LONG way to go on this one.
Tonight it was kind of weird, we were watching the third Narina movie. near the end (spoiler alert)
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the mouse decides to go onto Aslan's land. The cuter half and I were crying for the last 20 minutes of the movie....we are so sappy. Anyway the boy, he was apologizing to me because he couldn't cry. He patted his daddy on the chest and kissed me on the head and went to get ready for bed. He asked me why he couldn't get emotional and I informed him that some of it was because he was a teenager and the rest was because of his Aspergers. He kept telling me he felt guilty about it and I told him not to bother....compassion is taught at home. If you can't have empathy, at least compassion is a good place to start, right?
How did I figure that out? ....well it goes back to his friend's psych experiement.....she taught me that if my son doesn't naturally have empathy, at least we can try to teach him compassion. They are different species really; and to learn compassion is something that is taught.....not just a natural compunction of whatever.

Now if we could teach compassion to the kitties, maybe they would stop jumping on the bed at night....