Saturday, March 9, 2013

Working on scholarship essays.

The boy is working on scholarship essays.
This is a part of life the cuter half and I have never thought he would be doing. It is challenging and requiring and enourmous deal of thought. More so because we have to talk through the details then the boy writes out what he wants to say and how he believes things should be done..
These essay questions make me think of something a friend posted on FB about people who post every detail (I am guilty of doing this) - Marcel Proust: "It's so dreadful to think that in every trivial little thing you do, some one may be overlooking you." The things that we may believe are trivial are of sublime importance to someone like the boy.

I wail and moan about the picky parts of the boy....you know, when he is stuck on something or unable to process the whys and the wherefores.

We have been doing a lot of trivial stuff these days. Going over old issues, talking about friends and who means what and why this could be important. Cleaning out the mental attics. Which, really when it comes down to it is posting every detail as Proust decries. However, in another quote by Proust he also says, "What a profound significance small things assume when the woman we love conceals them from us."  So for the boy, what is worse, going into these details or not bothering with scholarship applications at all. The cuter half and I decided that doing the applications themselves would be good for him. The boy needed the extperience and needs to be like all the other kids by doing this kind of thing.

I think it has reflected on the cuter half and I. The cuter half has, to some, retreated into the television programing part of things (he likes The Big Bang Theory- it reminds him of the boy and he thinks its funny). I on the other hand have run to FB, like a friend I haven't heard from in a long time. Possilby the cure for stress, bordom or loneless of a mom of a kid like mine. Maybe this kind of life is too intense for some people. Regularly I hear about how "real" this blog is and how some people can't read it becuase of the reality and everything I discuss here. We have gone from study habits to mastrubation. I think it is too instense for me.

I never ever dreamed that pushing the boy as we have would have resulted in him wanting to be more. Wanting to go to college. Being nervous about growing up, getting his drivers license, getting a car.....living a life. That is all we wanted for him really and honestly, it scares me to pieces. I have, I am, panicking about what the boy is going to do. All the things the doc told us would never, ever, ever happen are here. NOW. Happening.



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